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My interview with Forced-bi.com

Let’s be honest, 2020 has been a real dumpster fire of a year for probably almost all of us. I know that for Me personally, the travel restrictions necessitated by the pandemic has forced me to cultivate both inner and outer stillness as I shelter in place. While our screens certainly allow for a degree of escapism, being physically unable to run away from uneasy feelings of anxiety, grief and loss has been a lesson in accepting My growing pains. But in spite of all the suffering this new normal has unearthed, I’ve also found some blessings and silver linings that I’m very grateful for. One of those silver linings is that I’ve been finding Myself really indulging in the simple pleasures of life–breathing air into the small sparks of joy that fuel My pervy heart with warmth and gratitude. What small moments have you found joy in recently?

For Me, it was an interview I did with Forced-bi.com where I got to really dive deep into My love for this fetish that has seen so little light this year! In answering the questions, I was reminded of all the delicious and devious scenes I’d had the pleasure of orchestrating in the past, and am excited for a future when we will be able to indulge in such physically-intimate play again!

I’ve included an abridged version of the interview below, and I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I did writing it. If you have some more time on your hands, you may also read the full interview here.

Forced-Bi.com Interview

 

Oh, man! Today we have a glamorous and kinky Mistress! She’s also a wordsmith; so, I feel sure we’re all in for a treat! Hello and welcome! Please, tell everybody your name.

My name is Mistress Lucy Khan, and you can call Me ‘Mistress,’ ‘Boss,’ ‘Goddess,’ or simply Lucy – depending on our chemistry.

“Boss”! I like that! Any other labels you like? “Alpha,” “Brat,” “Domme,” “Goddess,” “Mean Girl,” “Princess,” “Queen,” “Sadist,” etc.?

I would say that I am all of the above.

No kidding? You’re complicated!

Like many people, I am multifaceted, and one of the reasons I love My job is that I get to explore all the nooks and crannies of My subjectivity.

Right on.

Depending on the day, you can find Me in My ‘happy place’ as a bratty mean girl, a devastating tease, or a strict disciplinarian. I would say that the overarching category that all the others fall into is ‘Alpha,’ though… and I do consider Myself an Alpha Female through and through.

I’m definitely getting a sense of that! Tell me about your outlook on being a Mistress. I mean, is it just a bit of fun? Or a lifestyle? A spiritual exercise? Some Dommes seem to think of it as a role playing. Others leverage their professional endeavors into social activism. How do you see things? 

Again, I would say that I see Myself engaging in BDSM for all of the above reasons. While I do identify as a lifestyle Domina, I find pleasure in more extreme role plays, which My occupation helps to facilitate.

That sounds intriguing!

Of course, this is intertwined with fun/play, social activism, and spiritual enlightenment. I find that the divine and the profane often exist side by side, and in surrendering to our most depraved fantasies through kinky play, we are able to develop not only personally, but also spiritually.

Clearly, you have a deliberate and reflective point of view.

There is great power in taking on personas that are more extreme than our day-to-day self-expressions, and I think that the path toward self-actualization involves exploring our psyches in their full complexity.

I’m interested… given this layered approach, how do you see those who seek you out? A lot of Dommes use words like “Betas,” “Losers,” “Masochists,” “Slaves,” “Subs.” Do you find these to be too limiting, or do they facilitate the self-discovery you’ve been speaking about?

Personally, I don’t have a specific preference. I always welcome My playmates to tell Me how they identify, because it informs Me about their orientations. This is valuable data because, as they say, knowledge is power. The more information I can get from My playmate, the better I can use it against them 

Ha!

For the purposes of this interview, though, I’ll often be referring to folks who seek out My services as ‘playmates’ or ‘subs.

How long have you been interacting with these playmates and subs?

While I’ve been conducting in-person sessions since 2011, I didn’t begin My online explorations of D/s until 2017 when I started My Onlyfans and My Femdom clipstore.

Oh? Interesting. I am aware of several Dommes who started online and branched out to in-person. But you did it the other way around. So, do you still maintain a location for face-to-face meets, or has the online angle replaced everything else? 

Since I began My Domme career doing in-person sessions almost 10 years ago, I find that there really is no replacement for the electricity that occurs when playing in the flesh.

I imagine you’re correct!

I have a private, fully equipped dungeon space in Los Angeles, and a stable of loyal slaves who I train in person. Though I am open to adding new blood to My harem, those who are interested in serving Me should be service-oriented, versatile, and interested in expanding their own boundaries.

Readers! Are you paying close attention?

As an elite Mistress, My tribute is not cheap and I turn down sessions all the time – only those who are truly committed to transcending their egos should consider contacting Me via My official website.

Would-be applicants, take note! So, is this a money-making venture primarily? Or is it a combination of business and pleasure?

I’m fortunate to be operating from a state of abundance, so anything I do has to check multiple boxes.

Congrats!

For Me, My BDSM practice is a marriage of business and pleasure. But with a very full and busy life outside of Domming, I do expect My playmates to honor the attention bestowed upon them through showering Me in monetary tributes.

Indeed!

I’ve observed over time that men tend to value more what they have to financially sacrifice for, so I only take on new playmates who demonstrate their generosity readily. After all, orchestrating forced-bi and gangbang/blowbang scenes can involve quite a bit of organizing and planning, so I expect My labor of love to be recognized and reciprocated.

I’m sure the logistical considerations can sometimes be enormous. Given all that, I’m assuming… this is a full-time occupation for you, yeah? 

Bringing fantasies to life is My bread and butter. And I love being able to say that!

There are a lot of people who would be quite envious, no doubt! Do you feel comfortable sharing anything else about yourself, on either personal or professional levels? 

As a bisexual ethically non-monogamous Woman, I believe that variety the spice of life.

Ha! A humorous Internet meme framed a similar point in terms of a grammatical analogy: the singular word “mouse” is to its plural, mice, as the singular “spouse” is to the word you just invoked; namely… spice!

Let’s get into the titular fetish, shall we? I want to pick your brain a minute about the fetish’s name. “Forced Bi” appears to have two “parts”: (1) “force” and (2) “bisexuality.” Firstly, in your opinion, does true “bisexuality” – where a person is more of less equally attracted to females and males (but see a further question about problems with so-called “binarism”) – exist? Is it a thing?

Duh.

Lol! Al-right-y, then! Haha!

“Of course, it does! Where would this fetish be without that?

So, tell me… how do you think of it? I mean, is it part of a fetish-oriented lifestyle? Is it a game? A power play? A role play? How do you think of Forced Bi, specifically?

I think a single activity can check many boxes!

For sure!

As a creative person with a background in the arts, I absolutely adore a good role-play scenario — the more taboo and perverse, the better!

Oh, mercy! That could get a lot of people’s hearts pumping!

And in the same breath, there is something undeniably hot about a forced-bi scene based on a true story/feeling.

What do you mean?

If a sub really has an urge to experiment with men but has never had the guts to go through with it, I love being the straw that breaks the camel’s back (or butt lol).

Oh, I see! And… “straw the breaks …the camel’s butt” is hilarious!

It’s a rush to see someone doing something they would ‘never’ otherwise do, except for My influence. Also, as someone who enjoys novelty Myself, I enjoy being privy to someone’s ‘first’ – so, I totally get off on pushing people past their previous boundaries.

Yes! That’s very, um…intriguing! Okay, while I start thinking about baseball to calm myself, tell me, how do you refer to the fetish? By what name, I mean. “Coerced bi,” “coerced gay,” “encouraged gay,” “enforced bi,” “forced bi,” etc.

Any of those. They’re all designating the same thing.

Okay… here’s one…In practice, “forced bi” seems most often to apply to men being somehow impelled to perform sexually (or to imagine performing sexually) with other men. However, in theory, it seems that it could apply to other things – for example, to women being impelled to perform sexually with other women – as well. Do you see it primarily in terms of male submission, male and female submission, both, or neither? Please explain!

Oh, it mostly pertains to male submission. Being a FemDom, 95% of My clients are men. So, this is the lens through which I see this kink. For women, many of us are shades of bisexual already. And, historically, society has always been more permissive of female/female eroticism than male/male.

All good points.

In addition, much research has shown that female sexuality is much more flexible and adaptable. Shout out to the fascinating book A Billion Wicked Thoughts.

Oh, right on. I’ll put bibliographic information into the notes.

For Me, BDSM always speaks to the hard edges that form the taboos in a society. So, in this way, forced bi – as it pertains to men – is much more charged than it is for women.

Let me segue into the touchier part. The idea of being “forced.” Of course, for legal reasons, “forced” means something less than literally compelled by threats. But, which, if any, of the following do you think is most fitting? I’m thinking of “coercion,” “commandment,” “encouragement,” “enticement,” “inducement,” “instruction,” “permission,” “persuasion,” “provocation,” “seduction,” etc.

While I can run the gamut regarding the tone I take with My forced-bi subs, I really gravitate towards the middle of the spectrum: Persuasion, permission instruction, inducement, enticement, and encouragement. For Me, if a man has to be literally physically ‘forced’ – like tied down and made to take a dick in their mouth – the juice isn’t really worth the squeeze for Me.

Ha! That’s a choice turn of phrase! I love it!

On the other end of the spectrum, if we get into a room and the sub leaps for My stunt cock’s member without any goading on My part, then what the hell am I doing there?

Bwahaha!!! You paint quite a picture!

In that case I’m more of a voyeur – which is fine, but not forced-bi. What holds the most charge for Me is the psychological middle ground of forced-bi. I like to play the popular girl who makes two guys make out and go down on each other at a party; or the incestuous mommy who instructs her horny step-son on how to suck dick; or the femme fatal who uses the power of her sexuality to make her mark take it in the ass for her.

Is anyone else feeling a little warm??

I like when the gender cues get all mixed up, and the wiring in My sub’s brain crosses and intertwines to make an erotic web that can’t be untangled. Research has shown that even straight guys often become aroused when they see an erect cock or a cumshot (likely due to evolutionary purposes), so I use these physiological cues as material to be manipulated inside the dungeon.

 

Have mercy. Some women profess to enjoy guy-on-guy sex. Straight women sometimes liken their enjoyment to that expressed by straight men who like witnessing two women together sexually. And in the case of two women, it is reasonable to think that participants are not always lesbians or even bisexual. They could just be exhibitionists. Other women might just like viewing gay spectacles. And a few, more dominant types perhaps, seem to find the gender-bending and role-reversal aspects appealing.

While I can appreciate the aesthetics – and spectacle – of male/male sex, what really gets Me off about forced-bi is the gender bending and role reversal aspects of it.

I gotcha. A few women claim to want to date bisexual guys, participate in threesomes with them, etc. Others seem to think that once a guy tries guy-on-guy sex, he’s less desirable to women). This may be a difference of opinion between more dominant and more submissive women. What do you think?

I absolutely find Bisexual men more attractive.

Oh; no kidding?

The fact that a man swings both ways opens up so many possibilities for our interaction. It shows Me that he is secure in his own skin and doesn’t derive his value from conforming to the standards of our society. In addition, a queer boy opens doors for all involved. For example, I may not want to fuck him Myself, but I may want to see him fuck or get fucked, know what I mean?

I can surmise!

So yeah, if a man is willing to ‘take’ or ‘give it’ to another one of My boytoys, it gives him 2x+ chances of staying in My orbit ;-)

I hope readers are taking notes! Is the forced-bi fetish “healthy” or “unhealthy”? And…just to clarify, I’m asking about psychological wellbeing.

I always think it is healthy to enact one’s sexual fantasies in real life.

That’s cool.

The expression of a latent fantasy allows it to evolve and transform. Those who are frozen in their sexual proclivities are usually those who have denied the expression of their most charged fantasies. This is a great way to keep yourself in a sexual loop, which – functionally – ends up trapping you in your own sexual world-of-one… which is pretty alienating, if you ask Me.

A sort of psychosexual solipsism. Do you think of any of this is religious or spiritual terms?

I absolutely think that it can be transformative to do vulnerable-making things, like living out one’s sexual fantasies.

A quasi-alchemy?

I firmly believe that sluttiness can be an act of courage! Advocating and taking responsibility for one’s desires (sexual and otherwise) is an exercise in agency, which, in practice, is just an example of how we each take responsibility for the shape our lives take. When we build lives that mirror the acceptance we feel for ourselves, we relate to the larger world with a sense of security and abundance. This generosity of spirit, in turn, affects the people around you positively in a sort of ripple effect. Just how it’s oftentimes the closeted gay who exhibits the most vitriolic homophobia, I think that breaking down our rigid sexual boundaries (and the identities based on them) can help society evolve. Social taboos surrounding things like male/male eroticism don’t serve the contemporary landscape we live in anymore. Instead, these outdated ideologies create toxicity towards both men and women and should be exploded.

Quite an introduction to your outlook! Back to you, personally. Which do you prefer, having guys in dedicated roles, or having both guys being plastic enough to perform in any role I want?

I have no firm preference. I mean, as FemDom, I definitely have a soft spot in My heart for sissies, cumdumps, and power bottoms!

What’s your biggest turn on?

My list of fetishes is long and can seem a bit extreme to some ☺

I would expect nothing less from you! Lol!

In addition to forced bi, some of My favorite activities include full-toilet training, brown and golden showers, CBT, ball busting, cuckolding, degradation and humiliation, SPH, feminization, slut training, strap-on and pegging, role-play, ABDL, and anything having to do with foot and leg worship.

Mercy!

Generally speaking, I tend to enjoy creative role-play scenes, role reversals, and using the magnificence of My body against you.

Yes, well… I’m losing blood to my brain at the moment…But, before I totally lose myself, tell us: How can fans and other interested persons check out your work? How can they get a hold of you?

Readers! Are you paying attention?!

Wow! Boy…Thank you so much! You’re so cerebral – even poetic, frankly. Mistress Lucy Khan, everyone! Check her out…if you’re brave enough!

 

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